Peer Review for Kelly- "We didn't start the Fire"

Sarah Stifler
2-12-9
English102
Peer Review for Kelly, “We didn't start the Fire”
The writer did clearly state her thesis by saying, “Joel's main argument is that each generation added to the "fire" or troubled times in general.” Her draft deals with both rhetoric and subject matter. She included both, examples from the text and video, as well as illustrated ways that they used rhetoric as a way of persuading. The writer did identify the argument in form of the text and the video. She wrote that the song was written by Billy Joel, and argues that the struggles that went on in that time period were not all because of his generation, the baby boomer's. He explained this mainly by naming many other people and issues that also contributed to the struggles of that time.
The writer did provide specific examples from both the text and the video. Lyric-wise she wrote about how the use of the word “fire” could be used to symbolize the evil in the world. Another example she included was about Harry Truman, the president who then issued atomic bombs in WWII. The writer also reflected on the mood changes that occurred in different stanza's, using “Woodstock Festival and 'Space Race', the first manned lunar landing, successfully lands on the moon”. As for the video, the writer summarized it, then related it to the lyrics, using an example of pathos relating to the importance of each society's negative contributions to the matter. The writer could maybe have been more descriptive on how the song could possibly be good and helpful for people to hear and understand today. She could also go into more detail about imagery and symbolism near the end of that first paragraph. It could help to write more about how the lyrics or video was used with imagery, or maybe how it would affect other viewers of this song.
The analysis, of the support or examples picked, was the one thing that I'm not sure was included. This is all write though, because it's only the first rough draft, plus I'm not sure if I did this either:) You should explain how the examples you chose will in turn support your thesis.
One thing that stuck out to me in this essay would probably be when she wrote, “Billy Joel's lyrics appear to be 'a stream of consciousness in style'”. I mainly like this because of the way it sounds. It is also very true. The lyrics for the song really are a 'stream of consciousness'. They just go on and on with different names and issues that came up over the generations. I like how she wrote, “in style' though. This just makes the song seem neater, because normally the long list like it is would seem very unorganized; however, since it is in a some-what rhyming order, about relating issues, and in a song- it makes this okay.
Overall, I liked the essay, it really helped me understand the song more, because at first by reading the lyrics I had no idea what it was about... Even though I still don't quite know many of the people or issues brought up in the lyrics. Another thing I thought you could add is who the general audience would be to listen to this song or argument and why you picked them.